Fast Forward Please!

Today is the last day of March, a month I could have done without. Actually I'd like to be done with all of 2006 & 2007 at this point! Here is a brief run-down of my last 13 months...

Starting with my Stepfather Lloyd Carhart passing away after a long illness, two months later I began having problems with the eyesight in my right eye. After a month of almost daily doctors appointments a mass was found behind my left eye during an MRI. I'd had an MRI previously due to headaches and the tumor hadn't been seen by the radiologist reading the films :-(

A new round of doctors appointments followed, this time with Specialists up in Boston, MA. In August Dr. Peter Black, Chief of Neurosurgery at Brigham & Women's Hospital performed a left frontal craniotomy to remove the meningioma that was sitting on the back of my left orbit. The 4 to 5 hour surgery ended up being 9+ hours. They had a hard time keeping me breathing and my heart beating after the surgery. I will never forget waking up to my Mom and Frank hitting my feet saying "Breathe Susan, Breathe". I remember being annoyed at them since all I wanted to do was sleep and lay still. Every now and then I would hear them telling me to breath and feel them banging on my feet and when I'd open my eyes briefly I would see not only the two of them but also a number of Doctors and nurses hovering around and staring at me. I ended up spending an extra 3 days in ICU.

When I was released from the hospital I went to stay at my Mom's house in Forestdale (actually a part of Sandwich, on Cape Cod). My Grandmother, Louise Kelsey, also was staying at Mom's so that I would not be alone when Mom went shopping or eventually back to work. I was surprised at how much better I felt the first week after the craniotomy compared to the abdominal surgery that I'd had in 2005. After the first couple of days I would get into the back of my Mom's Chevrolet Tracker with a blanket and a couple of pillows (I wasn't allowed in the front seat for 6 weeks due to the passenger side airbags which could be fatal to me if they deployed into my head). Everyday the three of us would go to the Dunkin Donuts at Tradewind's Plaza on Route 130 and then bring the donuts and beverages to the Cape Cod Canal and sit watching the boats going out into Cape Cod Bay. A number of times we would drive around the Cape going past places that we had lived and reminiscing. After about 4 weeks I went back home. I had been missing my "doggy kids" horribly and for about 24 hours I was so-o-o happy! Then something happened...all of a sudden my mouth went very dry and I turned in my chair to get up and go into the kitchen for a glass of water. Before I could put weight on my feet to stand I had a very warm feeling come across my head, starting at the back near my neck and going right over my forehead. My body went very weak and it felt like if I even said a word I was going to pass out. It took all my energy to stay awake and not to hit the floor - everything is the room seemed to be swimming around! Frank was looking at me curiously and all I could manage was to put my index finger up, like I was saying "just a minute". I sat like that for about an hour before I felt well enough to be brought over to the day bed we had set up in the living room. I eventually fell asleep and when I woke the next day I felt like I had been run over by a train! In addition to the weakness I was a bit confused, my jaw would only open up wide enough to put my little finger between my teeth, and my gums were so inflamed that they were swollen over my teeth in places. A few hours later I was at Jordan Hospital in Plymouth and then transferred by ambulance back to Brigham and Women's. After 5 days they found that I had inflamed nerve endings in my jaw and gums and had suffered from some sort of setback, either cause by focal seizures or mini strokes. I had a number of these episodes over the coming weeks and had to deal with some cognitive issues. When I was released from the hospital I went to stay with my Grandmother since my Mom had to go back to work full time, but Mom drove from Plymouth to Mattapoisett (about 45 minutes) almost every day after work and then to her house in Forestdale (another 40 minutes). We spent many wonderful days sitting on the beach looking across Mattapoisett Harbor towards Falmouth and Martha's Vineyard.

I eventually came home in October. Once again I was so happy and thankful to be home. The day after I came home we lost one of our Gordon kids to an embolism. One week to the day later we lost our 20 year old cat to old age, thankfully he just went to sleep and never woke up. Bart had been the first pet that Frank and I had gotten together so his passing was very hard for us.

In November I was still having a lot of problems with double vision and blurred vision in my left eye. After an ophthalmic ultrasound a tumor was found near the site of the original. Was it a new tumor? Was it a bit of the first tumor? Is it the same type of tumor? After two more MRIs we don't know the answer, but are monitoring it. My next MRI is in May.

December saw my brother and family (Jen, Stephen and Sean) coming north from their home in Williams, Arizona for Christmas. We had a nice time with the family all together since my Dad, Kris and Kimberly were also able to come north from Arlington, VA. On the medical front, after an EEG I was told that the brain waves were showing "spikes", similar to pre seizure activity. Unfortunately our insurance wouldn't cover the cost of the $400.00 per month pills that were prescribed to me.

January came in cold, although thankfully we didn't have much snow this year. Since a few weeks after my surgery I had been noticing a bit of pain in my back that worsened by October and November. I was now in constant pain throughout my back, shoulders and hips. I felt like I was 90 years old at times. The first week of February came in very cold and windy with temps between 5 to 0 degrees and lower wind-chills. The weather was cold and dreary and so was our hearts when we lost one of our older Gordons suddenly to cancer. One week later one of our Nubian goats died in a freak accident. When I couldn't find him Frank and I spent hours looking with spot lights throughout the 200 acres of woods surrounding our house, thinking that maybe a coyote had gotten him. As I came back to the house to thaw my hands I saw him in the back yard dead. This was getting a bit much for me to deal with and I mentioned to my mother that I hope there isn't another death since they usually seem to come in threes.

About ten days later, after being in constant pain for about 6 months, I finally knew what was going on with me when my orthopedic doctor and my primary care doctor told me I had fibromyalgia, triggered by the craniotomy. This also explained the jaw and gum pain and some of the cognitive issues that had started in September they explained.

Two days after that I was talking to my Mom as I did every day. She was going to take her records to the accountant to get her taxes done. We talked about going to a Hunt Test that was coming up, something we had done together for a number of years. Even Lloyd, who hadn't been a dog lover before he met my Mom, had enjoyed going to the Hunt Tests to watch the Gordon Setter Grand-dogs. Mom said" Well I guess I have to go now" and we ended the call. Fifteen minutes later my brother called me and told me that Mom had just been killed in a car crash...I don't know if it still has really hit me that she is gone. We talked every day, she had rearranged her schedule to drive me up to Boston for all my doctors appointments and was helping me with the cognitive problems that I had since the surgery. I NEED HER! I'm so scared to be without her. In many ways, as those closest to me know, she was my lifeline and she always supported me in anything I wanted to do.

Throughout the last year there have also been people in the Setter world who have decided to kick me when I have been down by spreading the most vile, malicious rumors that I can imagine. Due to the Internet and email lists I have been tried and convicted without being given the opportunity to defend myself. It is especially hurtful because it is all lies. I try to look to the fact that people who prey upon someone when they are at their lowest point are the lowest sort of scum that exists and I am thankful for my true friends who have stood by me even when they were also accosted and branded guilty by their association with me. This and a spiraling depression brought on by the events of the last 13 months are what have contributed to my being lax in updating this blog.

And now after all that has transpired I find myself starting a new blog - Justice For Diane . I am appalled that the man who I've been told murdered my mother due to his negligence will only get about 2.5 years, if they are able to convict him. The days grow warmer as we head into April but they seem so empty. I am afraid of what the future will bring.......

New Blog "Justice For Diane"

I have made a new blog to keep track of what transpires due to my Mom's death - Justice For Diane

I will be posting links to news articles and updates there. Please stop by and check it out.

Sue

Letter To Governor Devol Patrick

Tonight I sent the following letter to Governor Deval Patrick, the Massachusetts Attorney General, the Mass. Secretary of State, and our Mass State and Federal Senators, Representatives, and Congressmen. If you would also like to write to Governor Patrick this list of contact information is here: http://www.mass.gov/?pageID=mg2utilities&L=1&sid=massgov2&U=utility_contactus

Dear Governor Patrick,

I am writing to you today in regard to our state's Driving While Impaired laws. On Monday, March 5, 2007 my mother, Diane Carhart, was killed in an auto accident on Rt 130 in Sandwich. As we attended my mother's funeral today the man who hit her was charged with Vehicular Homicide . After the funeral it was revealed to me that this man, Christopher Parker of 20 Jody Lane Forestdale, has a record that includes five driving while impaired charges. He also will be appearing in Falmouth District court on this coming Tuesday, March 13 on charges of operating under the influence of drugs in Bourne last October.

My mother was just 2 miles from her home in Forestdale, waiting to make a left turn into Tradewinds Plaza on Rt 130 when she was hit from behind by Mr. Parker who was driving at a very fast rate of speed. The resulting crash pushed her car into oncoming traffic where she was broadsided by an NStar pickup truck. Mr Parker's borrowed Honda Accord left no brake marks until after it was stuffed under my mother's Chevrolet Tracker. After being hit by the oncoming truck the Accord seperated from my mother's Tracker and then traveled 400 feet before coming to a rest. The driver of the NStar truck, Francine Abbott a 48 year old woman, suffered a broken pelvis and had both of her legs broken I am told. She had no chance to stop or avoid the accident according to the police. Mr Parker suffered a concussion and was treated and released.

Why was he allowed to be on the road? How can this kind of tragedy happen when this man has been convicted five times already, according to the Cape Cod Times, and yet he is not in jail at this moment? I was told he would recieve a summons to appear in court and that is also stated in the Times. This just doesn't seem right to me. My mother supported you in your campaign to become Governor because she was hoping for a
fresh change for Massachusetts. Please do not let her down and allow this man to remain on the street putting other lives in jeopardy. Please look into and tighten the current Driving While Impaired laws as soon as you possibly can. I am at a loss as to why this man wasn't already in jail.

Sincerely,

Susan Linhares

Charge of Vehicular Homicide in my Mom's Death

The police have charged the "man" (I'm being generous) with Vehicular Homicide today. Belosw is the article from the Cape Cod Times. Why is this person still on the street and not in jail!!??!!

Fatal crash draws homicide charge

By GEORGE BRENNAN STAFF WRITER SANDWICH - Christopher Parker, whose record includes five driving while impaired charges, will now face a vehicular homicide charge in connection with the death of a Forestdale woman Monday.

Police believe it was negligence on the part of Parker, 50, that set off Monday's three-car crash on Route 130 that killed Diane Carhart, 63.

Parker, who lives on Jody Lane just two miles from where Carhart lived, was charged with operating under the influence of drugs in Bourne last October. According to court records, Parker was driving erratically at the Sagamore Bridge before a state trooper pulled him over. He allegedly told the trooper that he was on methadone and Ativan, a sedative, according to the report. He said he was using the drugs because he had recently undergone knee surgery.
Parker was also charged with driving erratically and a marked lanes violation. His license was revoked by the Registry of Motor Vehicles after that arrest.

''I received information from the Registry that it was valid again,'' Parker said yesterday in a brief telephone interview.

Carhart, a mother and grandmother, was stopped waiting to make a left turn into Trade Winds Plaza at 11:30 a.m. Monday when her Chevrolet Tracker was rammed from behind by Parker's Toyota Camry, police said. The impact sent her car spinning into the path of an oncoming NStar pickup truck.

The pickup's driver, Francine Abbott, 48, had no chance of stopping before she slammed into the passenger side of Carhart's Tracker, police said. Carhart was pronounced dead at Falmouth Hospital.

Asked what went wrong Monday, Parker said, ''It's an investigation. I don't want to be on the record.'' He referred all other questions to his attorney but declined to say who represents him. ''Go to the hearing and find out.''

No date has been set for his arraignment. He will be summonsed to court, police said.
Meanwhile, Parker is due back in Falmouth District Court Tuesday for a hearing on the Bourne arrest.

Parker has not been charged with operating under the influence in Monday's crash. Sandwich Police Chief Michael J. Miller said the investigation continues and there could be additional charges filed.

Meanwhile, family and friends are gathering this morning at the First Congregational Church in Fairhaven to mourn Carhart's death.
Her husband, Lloyd, died one year ago. Carhart is survived by two children, four stepchildren and three grandchildren.
George Brennan can be reached at gbrennan@capecodonline.com.
(Published: March 10, 2007)

Funeral Info For My Mom

Thanks so much to everyone who has sent a message, your support at this horrible time makes it a slight bit easier. Here is the Funeral Information for My Mom.

Visiting Hours:
Friday March 9, 2007 3pm to 7pm
Fairhaven Funeral Home
117 Main St.
Fairhaven, MA 02719
Handicapped parking in the rear, all other parking across the street in funeral home parking lot.

Funeral:
Saturday March 10, 2007 10:00 am
First Congregational Church of Fairhaven
34 Center St. (corner of William St & Center St)
Fairhaven, MA 02719
Parking along the street

In lieu of flowers we are asking for donations to the American Lung Association of South Eastern MA 1 Abbey Lane, Middleboro, MA, the Brain Injury Association of America 8201 Greensboro Dr Suite 611, McLean, VA 22102, the American Red Cross, or toward a sponsored internship at Plimoth Plantaion. I am handling the Plantation donations so see me personally.

There will be charges of vehicular manslaughter filed within the next day or so against Christopher G Parker of 20 Jody Lane in Forestdale, MA who was born January13, 1957. This 50 year old man has been sited for speeding in the past. He never put on his brakes and hit her at approx 75 mph in a 40 mile an hour zone. My mother was waiting to turn left into Tradewinds Plaza and when he hit her it forced his Toyota Camry into and then under her rear bumper. Only after the point of impact are there skid marks and then it is a set of 6; his four times and my Mom's two front tires. The two cars slid together into the oncoming traffic where my mother was stuck in the right front my an NStar (Electric Co) pick up truck, who I've been told may have been going to fast. The woman in the NStar truck has a broken pelvis and both legs. I hope she is able to recover from her injuries. All new cars have "black boxes" similar to an airplane that record speed and braking on a 30 minute loop. So the Police will have no problem at all know how fast the vehicles were going. Christopher G. Parker ended up with a slight concussion and was treated and released. I hope he lives a long time haunted by the fact that he recklessly killed my mother for the rest of his slimy life and hopefully that time will be spent behind bars! Of course it probably wouldn't bother someone like him. Neither he nor the woman in the NStar truck have tried to contact our family to offer condolences. I left a message for the woman with the police wishing her well and a speedy recovery. The Police have been to the accident scene each day since and today my brother met them there and they had brought in a reconstruction specialist. I've never seen police so angry and they have all been so kind. They won't tell me the reason for the charges yet but some day soon, after they have a meeting with the District Atty, Ass't DA, Specialists and a number of the Police tomorrow they will release the accident report to us to have our questions answered. My Uncle/Godfather is the executor of the will and he has set up a meeting with an Attorney for me, my brother and the estate. If there is a criminal trial (or civil) I will be there each and every day in support of my Mom.

I've been running ragged and am starting to loose it but all I have to do is remember that I'm doing this for my Mom and it helps to pick me back up again. I can't wait for Frank to finally get back from the run he is on now. I spoke to him earlier and he was in Buffalo, NY and heading home :-) He should be here aound 4am.

Tomorrow and Saturday are both days that I don't look forward to. I know it will really hit home that she is gone then. I will be standing up and giving a speech about my mother for my brother and grandmother. I will post it here afterward. You can read through this blog and see how much my Mom means to me, we did so many things together. I used to wonder why I had this stupid tumor behind my eye. But now I know why. I had this stupid meningioma to allow me to spend a number of weeks with my Mom and my Grandmother after my surgery. Maybe that tumor wasn't so stupid after all.....

Sue

In Loving Memory

It is all so surreal. Today, on Rt 130 in Forestdale, MA, mile from her house, my mother was rear-ended and her car was then sent into oncoming traffic where she was hit head on by a utility truck, dying instantly. I had spoken to her on her cell phone as she was getting in her car...we hung up and she was gone 5 minutes later.......





I don't know if anyone is still checking in here. I haven't written for several reasons, which don't need mention right now. My Mom was known to a number of people who used to post here so I thought I would write something. Besides I'm here at home by myself tonight, don't think I will be sleeping much, and it is too late to call anyone. I'm not sure exactly what happened, other then what I wrote above, but the police tell me that it was definately not her fault and that there will be criminal charges filed, although they could not tell me what kind at this time. If you google the Cape Cod Times you will see an article. Tomorrow I meet with the funeral arrangements, which I promise to post here for anyone who is interested.

Diane "Dee" Louise Kelsey (Everett) Carhart

10/28/43 - 3/5/07